


The Fire of a Dragon

by ma_r



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Universe, Gen, Magic Revealed, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 13:42:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12322194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ma_r/pseuds/ma_r
Summary: Being a knight does not equal to being a good man. Merlin learns this lesson in the most horrible way one could.





	The Fire of a Dragon

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [All of Himself](https://archiveofourown.org/works/875160) by [StormDancer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/StormDancer/pseuds/StormDancer). 



> TW: RAPE
> 
> For more information about the warning check the Author's note at the end. Beware of spoilers.
> 
> * * *
> 
>  
> 
> If you read All of Himself by StormDancer you can see where the inspiration came about, this is in no way related to their work but since this story came after I read their work its only just that I give credit where credit is due.

 

There is nothing more boring, Merlin thought, than taking care of the King’s horses, yes they were beautiful animals, yes, they helped him  calm down, and all of them were so lovable, but the work was boring in its repetition, calming, but boring. Still Merlin did it with pleasure, he was alone on the stables brushing Arthur’s favorite mare, Rose, when one of the knights arrived, he was relatively new, and was not one of the knights under Arthur’s confidence, but still a strong warrior with a cunning mind, a noble by birth that had been exiled from his home due to a disagreement with his father, nothing important he said, just that his father had a different perspective than him, he had proved himself when he saved a girl from drowning so Arthur had issued his traditional one-minute-challenge, the knight was beaten in the first 20 seconds, but that was enough to start his training. Merlin knew all this, because he made it his business to know everything about the people that were in constant proximity to his King.

“Sir Joseph.” Merlin greeted and returned to his work.

“Merlin, could you help me with my belt? I need it to be taken it in and I can’t find my manservant.”

“Of course, let me just get a knife.” Merlin left the brush he was holding on the door of Rose’s stall. He was just going for one of the stable boy’s knifes when Joseph interrupted him.

“I have one here.” He said, showing him a small dagger in the likeness of the one Arthur had.

“Perfect.” Merlin smiled. “Please take off the belt so I can make the hole.”

“I’m not exactly sure where the hole should be.”

“Oh! Alright, don’t worry I can make the hole while you wear it.” Merlin kneeled and was just reaching for the knife in Joseph's hand when an alarm sounded in his head, it took him less than two seconds to realize why. Joseph was hard and the knife he was holding was making an arc before it hit Merlin with enough force to cloud his vision. Merlin stumbled and heard more than saw Joseph approaching him. Before he could do anything to get away or protect himself, Joseph tied his hands and the handkerchief Merlin always wore turned into a mouth gag. And then the fear made itself known in the sweat that suddenly drowned his hands.  

A smile appeared in Joseph's mouth as he took in Merlin state.

“Do you know, little Merlin, how sweet you look?” He started opening the laces of Merlin’s breeches, “So tempting with your eyes and  that disrespectful mouth, so incredibly tempting.” Merlin tried to get away again, and for his efforts, he was hit again. “I tried so hard to resist, but you are always _there_ and I couldn't, and here you are, alone and helpless and so alluring, there was no way I could win that fight.”

Magic, Merlin thought desperately, he could protect himself with his magic, he tried, but Joseph was wearing a protection charm. A new wave of fear that Joseph knew his secret, that he had prepared for this, invaded him and Merlin went still with panic, and tears he didn't know he was holding back, spilled.

“Oh, no, please don't cry, this is something we both need, I know this, don't worry. I will take care of you.” Merlin shook his head and tried to get away again. “Stop moving. I don't want to hurt you” The knife made its reappearance, and was pressed at Merlin’s throat; Joseph's voice had changed, it grew cold, and the sick fake sweet tone he had been using disappeared. Merlin went still but for a sob that escaped his throat. “There you see, that wasn't so hard now was it?”

He finished taking off Merlin’s breeches and one-handedly started taking off his own, after that, he maneuvered Merlin to his knees and arranged him in a way that all of his weight pressed into his bound hands, Joseph spat in his hole and that was the only thing that ‘eased’ the way, after that... after that Merlin remembered nothing but pain, fear, and disgust.

Minutes, hours, years later Merlin was still at the stables, still naked, still afraid, Joseph was in one of the stalls brushing one of the horses, he was humming a horrible song, about a girl who couldn’t run away, because a dog had bit her ankles and a fire burn her toes, and Merlin shakes, with anger, with fear, with impotence and when Joseph approaches him once more, opening his breaches, a scream that had been forming on Merlin’s chest since he first became aware that something was wrong is released and with it the magic he had fought so hard to hide. He screams and screams and in some part of his brain he notices what is happening, Joseph is backing away, scared and his shirt had been opened with the force of the magic escaping him in pulses. And there, formed with old burn tissue the word ‘rapist’ is. And once Merlin realizes this, that he is not the only one, that he isn't the first, the rope that had been tying Merlin’s hands is broken and it bounds Joseph’s, Merlin may have not been his first victim, but he would make sure he would be the last. Merlin continued to scream and rejoiced in the fear in Joseph's eyes.

Far away, outside Camelot’s borders, the painful scream and pure magic of a dragonlord awoke two dragons from a peaceful sleep, and they, in turn, screamed with their lord. The smallest one of the two, a white dragon with deep blue eyes, rose into the air, and with a voice in her head, pleading her to be careful, she flew in the direction of her kin.

In the lake where the dead crossed into the other side, a beautiful woman with long brown hair and a borrowed dress darted towards the surface of her burial site when a muffled scream reached her ears, the small fishes avoided her and the sword she was protecting. Once she broke the surface the anger behind the scream filled her with a rage she had never felt before, as well as sympathy, and with tears of anger and sadness, the Lady returned to the bottom of the lake, with only hope in her heart that her beloved would not break from his ordeal.

Hidden in the forest of Camelot, the druid settlements heard a scream of pure despair, most of them were sick with the magic that accompanied it and all of them, collectively, prayed to their gods and goddesses, for Emrys and his quick recovery and for the swift punishment of the person who had hurt him.

Outside Camelot’s borders, two sisters heard the scream, and while the blonde one rejoiced in the suffering of their enemy, the dark haired one, with eyes that once held kindness, suffered from the knowledge that she could do nothing to help the person from which the scream originated.   

___

For someone who claimed  to hate their job, Merlin did it with so much passion that it was almost funny Arthur thought.

It had been approximately an hour since he had sent a complaining Merlin to tend to his needs (the laundry had to be done, his armor had to be polished, the stables had to be cleaned, his room had to be swept) . In the meantime, Arthur was enduring the painfully long and dreadfully boring, council meeting with the Lords. The knights were outside in training, with Leon guiding them in the absence of their King.  They were talking about how one of the Lord’s daughter wanted to marry one of the Lady’s son, and how this simply couldn’t be, because another son wanted to marry that daughter, and the Lady’s son wanted to become an unmarried scholar. It was painfully obvious that this, long and useless, debate would not be finish for a long long time. So Arthur got comfortable and fought to keep his eyes open, a battle that he was close to losing until one council member rose from his chair in indignation, they had, somehow, dragged his wife into the problem and he simply would not stand for such disrespect.  Arthur turned and shared a tired smile with Gwen, she was sitting beside him, in the seat normally reserved for her husband, Lancelot.

"Esteemed Lords, and sweet Lady, I’m afraid this discussion is better suited for a more private location, and while it has proved entertaining, this is a council meeting, where we talk about the need of our esteemed kingdom, so could we return to the topic at hand?, what shall we do with the sickness that has began affecting our livestocks? Gaius found two people who can help, and both of them demand a lordship as payment and while I’m willing to pay that price so that my people don’t die of hunger there is no more land to give, so each one of you shall decide how much land you are going to donate to this cause.” Arthur said in his most soothing tone and was rewarded for his efforts in looks of indignation and frustration, but the council members, handpicked by himself,  had already started making alliances and plans to donate pieces of their land so the peasants wouldn’t die. Gwen was beaming up to him, and a sweet smile adorned her lips as she gazed to the table, where the nobles protected the people under them.  

Less than five minutes later the meeting abruptly ended, when a scream filled with anguish, reached their ears, it was accompanied by an abrupt wave of dizziness, Gaius was the first to stand, Arthur could see how one of his eyes was gold, before he could demand answers, Gaius ran towards the open windows and hurled. Gwen was at his side in an instant, but a shocked gasp kept her hand hovering above the old physician's back.

“Arthur, you better come and see this.”   Her voice was shaking, she looked pale and when Arthur approached the window he could see why, the stables where surrounded with something that could only be described as a dragon made of fire, as the realization sank in, one of his new knights, a brave young man who had been a beaker, ran into the council chamber and proclaimed in a deep and breathless voice that there was magic at work in the stables and that the presence of the King was required immediately.

With his sword at his side, he started running, he could feel Gaius and Gwen following him at a slower pace, stopping constantly as wave after wave of dizziness attacked them.

When he arrived at the stables he couldn't help but be surprised, the stables where not burning, the people who had come to gap where unharmed and no matter what (brave, foolish, insistent) attempts the knights made to enter the stables they couldn’t pass the coiled body of the dragon that covered all the entrances to them.

Percival was the first one to spot him, he was in his training clothes, no armor, but he had his trusted sword at his side, before Arthur could begin to ask for a report, Percival started talking.

“Sire, it appeared out of nowhere while we were training.” Arthur nodded and gestured for Percival to continue “ We saw this red light in the sky and the dragon appeared immediately after, so we ran all the way here.” A small _tud_ sound indicated how another band of knights had failed to reach the inside of the building. “We have been trying to get in, but... well Sire, the dragon won’t let us.”

“Has there been any injuries?” Arthur asked, calculating his approach, he had to get in, had to save all of those who were inside.

“No.” Arthur opened his mouth to speak and was interrupted “and before you ask the stable boys are fine, they weren’t there when it appeared.” Again he opened his mouth and again he was interrupted.  “Also, Sire, as you can see the fire is not burning anything. Its not doing anything. The only thing it does is push us away from the stables.”

Before he could continue with his inquiry, Gaius and Gwen arrived, Gaius with a green tint in his skin and one of his eyes still alight with the color of magic.

“No one is going to be able to get in.” Gaius proclaimed, when Arthur raised one of his eyebrows in a pale imitation of the physician, he elaborated. “That is a protection spell, its purpose is to keep the caster _away_ from people that may hurt them. It's a fairly easy spell I think almost every sorcerer may cast it. You just need magical blood mixed with fear." Gaius stoped talking and seemed to be pondering on something. "I reckon even you might cast it, Sire."

"How can we break it?" Gwen asked

"You can't." Gaius replied. "The only one who can break it, is the one who casted it. And they won't, not until they feel safe again." Arthur was just opening his mouth to ask what he should do then, when Gaius continued. What was with people always talking before him. "But I must tell you, Sire, before you condemn the caster to Uther’s justice, this spell can only be created out of instinct and fear, they are not aware of it.”

“So what you are telling me is that it won't hurt anyone?”

Gaius nodded and continued to talk. “It's designed to scare people away. To _make_ them go away when the fear doesn't work, but as you can see My Lord, the knights are not scared.” Gauis raised one of his eyebrows as if to emphasize the foolishness of Camelot's knights. And while the circumstances were not the most ideal, Arthur felt a rush of pride for his brave (foolish) knights.

“What about your eye?” Arthur asked, it was still gold, but the color was losing its shine.

“I think the dizziness everybody is experiencing is a product of the magic of whoever is inside there. I am afraid it's too much, too uncontained. I...I don’t know exactly why it's making my dormant magic so active.”

Arthur considered Gaius's answer before asking “Is that why you were sick? Too much magic for your body?”

“Yes, this... this is not something I’m used to, my body is not ready to accept so much magic." Arthur raised his eyebrow again. "You need to train your body to perform powerful magic Sire, just like a knight has to train constantly to improve his skill." Arthur nodded and Gaius continued. "I suspect that for those without magic it's probably a mild inconvenience, while for those like me who have dormant magic are probably feeling similar to me but I am sure that those who practice magic are having a much more severe reaction.”

Arthur nodded and turned in time to see another fruitless attempt at breaching the doors.

“Alright, everybody stop,” Arthur commanded, it took almost a minute for everybody to start paying attention to him, the people who came for the show included. “I have been informed that we will not be able to breach the stables, but do not worry, this magic won’t hurt us.”

“How can you be so sure?” came a scream from somewhere in the crowd.

“It's not hurting anyone who is not coming in close proximity, and beside the horses are calm. For now this is proof enough that it means us no harm.” There were more question shouted, and the crowd was growing restless so Arthur gave a complicated hand signal, and all the knights formed a circle that surrounded the stables, far enough so that the dragon would not force them back, and close enough to the crowd so they could keep them away.

The King’s favorite knights made another circle, this one included Gaius and Gwen, in its center stood Arthur, and in this little circle a plan was forming.

For about twenty minutes nothing happened, the murmur of isolated conversations easily ignored when one was faced with a puzzle in the shape of a dragon.  The members of the Round Table continued to talk strategy, bouncing ideas with Gaius, who proceed to refute them out of impracticality  and as he put it ‘simply the most idiotic thing I have heard in all my years, Gwaine, and I have been living with Merlin for years.’  Just as they were about to open the discussion to the other knights, the doors of the stable open, immediately the circle of knights surrounding them drew their swords.

Out of the doors, a tied figure appeared, his eyes filled with fear and the evidence of it could be seen in the wet patch on his leg, but that wasn’t what captured the knights attention, it was the scar tissue that formed the word ‘rapist’ in his chest that had all of the warriors attention.  He continued to walk as if someone was forcing him, tears and snot and pleas of mercy mixed in his mouth.

It was Gwen who recognized him first. “Sir Joseph,” she said in a whisper that was loud enough in the now quiet courtyard, the heads of the people gathered there turned and started at her with incomprehension until they too realized that the man, the monster, coming out of the stables was one of Camelot’s knights.

Joseph stopped walking in the middle of the square and the word in his chest seemed to glow until no one could miss it.

“Arrest him,” Arthur said, his voice cold and hard with anger and disgust that he had started to trust this man. The Knights closer to the monster grabbed him by his arms and if they were not careful in their treatment no one raised any complaints, before Joseph could be carted away to the dungeon where he could rot for all Arthur cared, he had to know who was inside the stables, for the fire dragon still remained. After another signal from their King, the knights frog matched their previous ally until he was kneeling and sobbing in front of Arthur. “Who is inside?” Arthur asked. Joseph shook his head in fear. “WHO IS IT?” Arthur roared, he was angry and there was no other conclusion to be drawn, whoever was inside had suffered at the hands of this man.

“I can’t say." He sobbed. "Their magic, it won’t allow me.” his words brought an angry twist in Arthur's stomach. Then he asked another question. 

“Is there anyone who can get inside? Can you tell me this?”

“I think they would allow the physician.” Joseph said, when he spoke again the words seemed to be forced out of his mouth, making it sound like multiple people were talking all at once. Arthur nodded in acknowledgement and turned his eyes to the knights that had brought Joseph to his knees.

“Get him out of my sight and put him in the stocks, he doesn’t deserve the comfort of the dungeon.” The knights nodded and Arthur turned around to ask Gaius if he could try and approach the stables, when another scream tore thru the air, this one, this one was just filled with sadness, but it was longer than the others and as the person inside screamed, the earth started to tremble and storms clouds to gather, and with another terrible scream the animals that had been inside the stables were released. 

Rose, Arthur’s favorite mare, immediately approached him, he noticed, almost in amusement, how all the horses were calm and approaching the knight with which they had the most affinity. With a start, he noticed that the only horse that was alone was Silver, Merlin’s favorite. This could only mean that Merlin was not in the courtyard, a suspicion (horrible, horrible suspicion) began to arise in the recesses of his mind, it was drowned by a wave of denial before it would reach full consciousness, after all Merlin was safe, Merlin was _always_ safe and was probably napping in the kitchens like he usually did.

Once the commotion that the horses caused was quieten, Arthur saw Gaius walking with purpose to the doors of the stables, one of his eyes once again alight with gold, his brow was pitched and his mouth set in a serious line. He walked until he was standing before the dragon’s head, Arthur was close enough to hear Gaius asking permission to enter and promising not to hurt the person inside, the dragon nodded and the part of his body that was warding the stable doors disappeared until Gaius entered the building, then as quickly as it had banished it reappeared.

 

___

 

Please don’t let it be Merlin, please don’t let it be him, Gaius thought. He was afraid, from the first moment he heard the scream something in his belly had tightened in a way that couldn't be attributed to sickness and the way his dormant magic had reacted made him even more afraid for the boy he considered his son. Once inside Gaius gasped in shock, the stables where a wreck but worse, the smell of blood and semen filled the air, there was also the lingering smell of horse and human urine. Gaius sent one prayer to the gods he worshiped in secret and walked on ahead. His heart was crushed by a sudden pain. His prayer had not been answered.

Merlin was curled into himself,  he was naked from the waist down, dried blood colored his thighs, he was trembling and crying and his eyes were empty but for the color of the magic that protected him. The ever-present handkerchief that normally covered his neck was gone. Gaius approached him in small determined steps and talked along the way.

“Merlin, it's me, it's Gaius, I’m walking closer to you if you want me to stop just tell me.” Merlin nodded in understanding. “The horses are safe, that was quite the magic, never had seen anything like that.” Closer, closer, almost touching him. Gaius sat next to him, careful in his movements and careful to keep the anger and sadness out of his voice.  Gaius continued to talk until Merlin stopped trembling until he was a little more clam. When Merlin did, Gaius stretched his hand to touch his shoulder only for his hand to bounce back before he could make contact, only then did Gaius notice the small bubble of magic that surrounded the young warlock. It was a painful realization, Merlin wouldn’t let anyone touch him, not when he didn’t feel safe.  So Gaius continued to talk and talk until he could feel his throat hurting, until Merlin stopped crying and emotions returned to his eyes.

“Lancelot.” Merlin said, in a broken hoarse whisper. Gaius nodded and stood up, feeling all of his years in a way he hadn’t before.

“Do you want to be alone with him?” Gaius asked, in a whisper, Merlin shook his head.

“Please come back.” Gaius nodded once again and as slowly as he had come, he exited the stables. The dragon did nothing to stop him from leaving, but he felt its eyes following him in his grief.

___

 

Keep calm, you are a knight of Camelot, your wife needs you to be calm. Lancelot thought as he held his wife's hand, Guinevere was shaking and pale, he could see that she was afraid for the person inside of the stables and angry that for how much Camelot had improved under it’s new King rule, it was still not enough to stop such atrocious acts from happening. Lancelot shared his wife’s feelings, but he also had a horrible suspicion that he knew who was inside those protected doors, there was only one person missing, the one person which normally reminded by their King’s side.  He did not share his suspicions, for every single fiber of his being hoped that he was wrong in his conclusions.  

The knights waited some more, most of them staring at the sky, torn between wanting it to rain in the hope that the dragon disappeared, and afraid because those clouds had not come naturally.

Lancelot saw Arthur pacing like he did when he was facing a problem he still couldn’t find a solution for, almost an hour had passed since they had all come to the courtyard to witness the display of uncontrolled magic, and people were getting restless.

“Calm love,” Gwen said. “You are shaking.” her voice brought a smile to his face and immediately he felt a little more calm, enough so that his uneasiness remained in his head instead of manifesting in his body.

He placed a small kiss on the top of her head and felt her relax her grip on his hand, this what was missing in his life: someone with which he could share everything, someone whose presence was enough to make him feel better.

Lancelot loved Gwen, and Gwen loved Lancelot, it was simple, easy in the way it had shaped them; and they owned it all to Merlin, who had been patient before they realized the depth of their feelings, who had been the messenger of their tokens of affection when the courting started, who had been beside Lancelot when their wedding had finally happen, with a smile and a _finally_ murmured loud enough so that all the guest could hear once they kissed and made it official. Merlin was, in some bizarre way, both their best friend and little brother and they loved him.

So caught was Lancelot in his thoughts that he didn’t realize when Gaius exited the building alone,  but he did notice the arch of his back and the sadness in his eyes. It was enough to confirm his fear. Merlin was the victim.

Instead of stopping in front of Arthur like Lancelot had expected, Gaius walked until he was in front of Lancelot and told him. “He wants to see you, leave your sword behind.” Lancelot nodded and unbuckled the belt that held his sword, he passed it on to his wife and gave her another kiss, this time on her cheek, and started following Gaius.

Arthur appeared before them, rigid with tension and uncertainty, he didn’t ask anything, he didn’t have to, Gaius answered the unasked question.

“They asked for Lancelot.”  Arthur nodded in understanding. “They are not ready to come out.” Another nod. “They were raped,” Gaius confirmed, his voice, until then calm, trembled with anger. It felt like a punch in the stomach, this, this was nothing to his worse fears. He heard Gwen hold back a sob behind him, she had probably arrived at the same conclusion as Lancelot had.

“Joseph shall face trial once the person is out of the stables and treated.” Arthur said, his voice hard with anger, Lancelot and Gaius nodded and without further delay, they walked into the belly of the (literal) beast.

As they walked Gaius told Lancelot how to act: let Merlin have a choice about everything, talk in a calm confident voice, and for the love of everything that was holly, no forceful or sudden movements.

Inside Gaius was the first to talk, his voice in what Lancelot called his working voice, he had heard it all the times the physician had treated his wounds.

“Merlin, I’m back. Lancelot is here with me, we are going to start approaching you if you want us to stop just let us know.”  And they did walk, slowly and carefully, Lancelot taking his cues from the old physician, he had to contain an angry sob when he saw the state of Merlin. He still was curled into himself, his eyes no longer empty but fearful, he was still naked and with almost a clinical eye Lancelot noticed that the side of Merlin’s neck was bleeding from a knife wound. His hands curled in such a tight fist that his nails brought blood to the surface, it was the only sign of how powerless he felt.  

“Hello, Merlin,” Lancelot said. “You asked for me?” his voice was calmer than he could imagine, careful in the way they spoke and moved, both men continued to walk towards Merlin.

Merlin nodded.  

"Can I sit next to you?” Lancelot asked. Merlin nodded again. Once he was sitting next to him, Merlin started crying again. Gaius was a little further away from them both, also sitting, he shoots a worried look at Lancelot. “Am I too close? Do you want me to move?” Merlin nodded, then shook his head, then nodded again, indecision clouding his eyes. Lancelot was starting to move when a hand shoots and grabbed the corner of his sleeve.

“Stay,” Merlin said, his voice a broken whisper. Lancelot stayed. Merlin continued to cry. He curled into himself, but before he could remove his hand from Lancelot sleeve, Lancelot took it, and held it like one did something precious, it seemed to ground Merlin.

“I couldn’t use my magic against him.” Merlin said, his voice just above a whisper. “He had a charm or something, I could... I couldn't stop him, he hit me… and I was so afraid Lancelot, so afraid.” Another horrible sob escaped Merlin's lips, Lancelot fought to keep the tears out of his eyes.  “He said he wanted... wanted another round, but he had to do something first, so he started brushing Rose.” Merlin had started shaking again.  “HE TOUCHED ROSE” he screamed, Lancelot felt another wave of magic hit him and closed his eyes to fight the dizziness. “Like he had a right, and then this _song_ this awful _song_ , he would not shut up, he kept singing." 

"What happened next?" Gaius asked, when it became obvious that Merlin wasn't going to talk anymore. 

"I couldn’t move." Merlin continued. "My hands were tied, but then he started walking towards me, and then.. and then my magic.” Merlin sobbed again, and he rested his head on Lancelot shoulders. “It just broke loose. He was so afraid of me. It felt good, that he felt what he made me feel, but then I saw his chest, I was not the first and my magic just, it roared with anger. Did you hear it?” Merlin asked, he sounded so detached from his tale, but Lancelot had heard more than one person speak like that, knights who had survived a war against all odds, but that tone never got easier to hear.  

Lancelot nodded “I heard it, I think most of Camelot did.” Merlin looked at Gaius for confirmation.

“We did Merlin, we heard your magic.”  Satisfied with their answers Merlin continued to speak.

“He peed his breeches, and started begging me for mercy, as if he deserved it, as if I wished to grant it, but it is not my place to pass judgment, it's Arthur’s, but I was so tempted. I almost killed him, I think I still could. But I didn't and I won't. So I kept him there." Merlin pointed to one of the walls of the stables. "Tied by his hands, wet from his own urine, for as much as I could bear it, I want him to feel afraid." Lancelot nodded and gripped Merlin's hand harder.  "But I am still so afraid of him. I could not bear more of his presence. So I  casted him out and I made him unable to speak my name. He isn’t worthy of saying my name.”  Merlin said, his voice once again above a whisper.

“He deserves death,” Lancelot said, the anger he had been containing was released as he spoke. Merlin winced at his words, he lifted his head and moved a little away from Lancelot, but he kept his hand where it was. “He will die, Merlin, I give you my word, as a knight and as your friend, I will see him dead for his crimes. He won’t hurt you again I promise.”

Merlin let out a small humorless laugh. “I think you are too late Lancelot. I think he broke me.”

Lancelot felt his heart break.  

___

It can’t be, It won’t be, Arthur thought. He was still pacing, this time the length of Rose, the horrible thought he had was refusing to disappear, and every time it was drowned by a wave of week denial it appeared stronger than ever.

Rose reminded forever patient with his inner turmoil, occasionally neighing, but calm in the face of the activity that surrounded them. The circle of knights still held firm, Percival, Gwaine, Elyan and Leon were behind him talking among themselves, occasionally shooting worried glances to Arthur and to the stables, they had probably reached the same _wrong_ conclusion Arthur had, there was no way that the person inside the stables was Merlin, just no way. He was still pacing when an angry scream, this one accompanied with unintelligible words, reached them, followed by another wave of magic. After that the people were quiet and the conversations that had started disappeared.

Less than five minutes later, the doors opened again and Gaius exited the stables, alone. This time he walked directly to Arthur and spoke in a tired broken voice.

“I need to treat the person inside. From what I can see they are still bleeding but they refuse to exit the building since they are afraid they will be punished for their magic.” Arthur nodded and asked the question that had been running thru his mind since the first time the physician exited the stables. 

“Why was Lancelot requested?”  Gaius visibly hesitated before answering.

“Lancelot already knew of this person magic, and the person inside trusts him.” Arthur nodded again as the stupid, incorrect, horrible thought resurfaced again, he needed to go inside the stables.

“What do I have to do to show them that they are not in danger of the law?”

“Tell the dragon, if he believes you sincere, it will let you pass.”  Arthur nodded and had started walking before Gaius stopped him with a hand on his chest. “You must leave your sword, and hear me very carefully when I say this Arthur Pendragon, you will speak to them in a careful and calming tone, you will ask for permission before you do _anything_ , and if they refuse to do something you do not coerce them to do it, you convince and ask them. Do I make myself perfectly clear?” Arthur nodded once more. “Go ahead, I will be right behind you.” For some reason, it sounded like a threat.

Once Arthur stood in front of the dragon, Arthur held the piercing stare of the dragon and before he could begin to speak the dragon spoke into his mind.

_“Those who wish to enter:_

_no weapons shall they bear,_

_no desire to harm what is within,_

_I have no patience for those who lie_

_so speak the truth or you shall die._ ”

“I give you my word as the ruler of Camelot and as her knight that I will not persecute the person you protect, for the magic they casted today was born out of fear and desperation. I promise that the scum who did this to them shall be punished and that they will be granted my protection.”

_“You have spoken the truth_

_I have seen deep in your heart_

_But beware, if you break your oath_

_Your soul will be shattered in tiny parts.”_

Arthur nodded, and entered the empty stables without fear, his word was law, and he never broke (his) law, Gaius continued to walk behind him, a flicker of pride shone in his eyes when Arthur meet his gaze.

Arthur followed the soothing noises he recognized came from Lancelot and his horrible, awful, no good thought was confirmed. It was Merlin.

“Merlin,” Gaius said. “I came back, Arthur is with me.”

Merlin eyes shoot up and made eye contact with Arthur, terrible emotions, emotions Merlin shouldn’t feel, where swirling behind the gold of his eyes.

“Arthur,” he said, his voice steady for what Arthur suspected was the first time in a while. A crushing wave of sadness, anger, and despair almost drowned Arthur under its weight but it was nothing compared with the helplessness he felt as he took in the appearance of the person he loved the most.

“Merlin.” He said, tears spilling out of his eyes. “I’m sorry.” He said, for what else could he said? He had failed in his duty to protect the people of his kingdom the moment he knighted a rapist. He had failed as a knight when he didn’t notice the signs of a sick mind in their ranks. He had failed as a friend for not being there with Merlin, worse he had failed as a man in love, when he had made the object of his affections afraid of him, because of him, because a stupid law that was still in place. Merlin shook his head and made a quick hand gesture for Arthur to come near him. Arthur did slowly as Gaius had instructed and sat where Merlin had pointed. Once he was sitting Arthur spoke again. “How do you want him to die?” There was no way that monster would live to see another day.

Merlin made a surprised noise at Arthur question. “I want you to punish him the way the law states you should.” Now it was Arthur’s turn to make a surprised noise, the word really didn't deserve Merlin. Arthur sat quietly as he thought of the crimes Joseph had committed, and the appropriate punishment for each of them. When he had recalled everything, he spoke.  

“For his crimes against you, for his deceit to the crown, for his broken vows as a knight, the punishment that awaits him is as follows: one hundred lashes, three days and three nights in the stocks, with no food, and hanging,”  Arthur said with finality. “So I have proclaimed and so it shall be done.” Merlin nodded and extended one hand in the direction of Arthur, he took it, gently and together they cried for the injustice that had been made. Merlin sobs racking all his body. Merlin's arms stretched in Arthur’s direction and a small sob escaped him. Their embrace, Arthur recalled, lasted somewhere between a moment and an eternity.

“Merlin.” this was Gaius speaking. “I need to treat you.” Merlin tensed in Arthur’s arms.

“No." Merlin shook his head, this caused a worried look to appear on Gaius face that disappeared when Merlin spoke again "They are still outside,” Merlin said as an explanation, and Arthur understood. Merlin was a prideful man, and the last vestiges of pride he felt he still had were to be protected.

“Then I will make them go away,” Arthur said, kindly and forcefully in the way only he could.

“Stay,” Merlin said, so Arthur did. "Someone else will take care of it." 

 

___

 

It's been too long. Leon thought, he was not used to such grand display of magic and to be honest it made him a little bit afraid but more than that it made him feel curious.

Curious about how such magnificent power was not hurting anyone, was just keeping them at bay, was just _protecting_. More than anything Leon was fighting the urge to touch the fire dragon. A voice in his head that sounded too much like Gwaine for his liking was urging him to do it, after all, it wouldn’t burn, just as he was about to snap to the metaphorical Gwaine to shut up and stop trying to tempt him, he heard a sound of nightmares: dragon-wings caught in mid-flight.

He was not the only one who recognized the sound, all the knights who had survived the dragon attack looked up into the sky, searching for a familiar and terrifying sight. The sight was terrifying but not familiar, as a white dragon descended into the courtyard, ignoring the lances and swords that were thrown against her. The white dragon bumped her head against the fire dragons side as if to call for attention. The fire dragon opened its mouth and shooted fire to the white one and while it seemed not to harm her, the white dragon looked almost displeased.

 _"Touch it.”_ said his inner Gwaine. _“Look at it, it's magnificent. Look at that color, that is the color of the clouds and the moon, not something one could simply touch. Do it come on.”_ Leon cursed at his inner Gwaine and tried to keep his wandering hands from making an apparition.  

He saw one of the new knights charge with a lance in his hands to try and kill the creature. The dragon response was to roar and immediately the knight dropped the lance and slowly retreated, and then something so odd and amazing happened that Leon had to pinch himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. The dragon spoke.

“My name,” she said in a feminine voice that sounded like twinkling bells. It was enough to stop everybody in its tracks.  “is Aithusa. I am here because someone has harmed my lord. I am here to protect him, if someone wishes to harm him, they will die by my fire, by my claws, and by my fangs.” Aithusa then raised her head and stared at the place Leon knew the stocks to be “To the person who did this, be thankful that my lord believes in Lady Justice and does not consider himself the one responsible of being sure that Her demands are meet. Be thankful that he has ordered me not to attack anyone within the borders of Camelot, to not attack someone who is considered part of this land. Be thankful that you will not suffer as much as you should because you are going to die by the King’s law and not mine.” She then turned her gaze to Leon, her eyes were so blue, Leon could swear one could swim in them. “You are trusted by the King and by my Lord, and you are loyal to both of them in turn, so you will carry this order for it was made by both of them. All of those who are here for gossip and unsolicited protection shall leave this courtyard and not return until the King has commanded it. Those allowed to stay are the knights and the Lady considered part of the Round Table if someone does not obey this command, punishment at my claw awaits them. Go and follow the orders of Emrys and the Once and Future King”

Leon didn’t even have time to speak before he noticed that people were already moving.  The members of the Round Table stayed and as the last person left the courtyard Aithusa nodded and in a tongue, only one human had the ability to understand roared into the sky. Moments later, the water that had been contained in the summoned clouds started to fall and the stable doors opened, from them came three figures whose walk was weighted down by sadness.

Arthur in the middle, holding Merlin in his arms in a way that told more than one story. Lancelot was at his left and Gaius at his right. Arthur glanced at Leon and nodded. Leon, in turn, looked at the knights and at Gwen and all of them made a circle around Arthur, filling the spaces left.

As they walked the fire dragon followed them, and slowly started to shrink in size, until it was but a small flame that leaped into Merlin's chest and disappeared where his heart should be. Aithusa followed behind them and made an annoyed noise when she noticed she couldn’t fit through the doors. Merlin smiled at that. 

“I will make you smaller sweet _‘Tusia_ , do not fret."

At this Aithusa spoke in dragon-tongue.

"I won't leave your sight.” Merlin said and with a careless wave of his hand and a _there-and-gone_ gold in his eyes, Aithusa got smaller, until she was the size of a hound pup.  She flew around them for some steps until she landed in Leon’s shoulders, unfolding one of her wings to cover them from the rain and spoke into the mind of those honorable and brave: into the mind of the members of the Round Table.

_Protect him, for he will need all of his loyal friends. The journey to recovery won't be easy and at moments will feel impossible, so help him keep his strength, and his hope. For there will be a time when this will be an old scar instead of an open wound._

* * *

_(...)I'll live my life to the full and have a smile on my face_  
_I'll wipe you off my mind and leave you alone in this place_  
_I don't feel sorry for you or how you find it hard to survive_  
_'Cause you stopped me from living a normal life_  
_So cry in front of me and beg for mercy_  
_I won't show it to you, someone so unworthy_  
_I'll ignore the pain and the tears you cry_  
_And don't you dare ask me why(...)_  
  
_ Mistakesimake _

 

**Author's Note:**

> At Depth Trigger Warning: 
> 
> Merlin is raped by a knight, there is nothing graphic but its deeply implied and there is narration about the events leading up to it and the events that happen afterwards. There is a moment when we learn that Merlin is not the first victim but there is no discussion about the other victims.
> 
> * * *
> 
>  
> 
> Longest fic I have ever written and finished. This idea came about because I couldn't sleep and wanted something to write.
> 
> I think I was also subconsciously inspired by the music video of [King and Lionheart](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A76a_LNIYwE&list=RDMMwXUloVYbchg&index=27) by Of Monsters and Men
> 
> Also I know this story is in cannon but there isn't a time where: Excalibur is in the lake, Morgana and Morgause are together, Aithusa is alive, the Round Table is a *thing*, Lancelot is alive and a lot of other things... but still this is a cannon au so everything is cool and fine... right? 
> 
> If you see any spelling/gramatical errors please let me know. 
> 
> Don't forget to comment.
> 
> Also what do you think of the title? do you understand why its called The Fire of a Dragon?
> 
> Find me on [Tumblr](http://exolovek.tumblr.com/) or check out my [Merlin Fic's Rec Blog](https://howshitgoes.tumblr.com)
> 
> \--Edit: 31 of October of 2017
> 
> A lot of people asked for a sequel and while I would like to give a 'happy' ending to this story I'm afraid that while this story needed a lot of research, a story centered on the trauma and the physical, mental and emotional recovery that happens after rape is not something I'm prepared to write about because I don't have the necessary knowledge about the subject.


End file.
